Sunday, May 11. 2008Syria: An Innocent Abroad (Part I)
Epilogue
This dialogue is not an ambitious search for a solution to the rift between Arabs and Americans, nor is it plagued with disdain--or even incomprehension-- for the general Midwestern misunderstanding of Arab life. My 'agenda,' such as it is, is to tell a true story of sensory observation and authentic experience from my time as an oblivious white American, living in the heart of Damascus. My guide through my two weeks in the Middle East was Miriam, a Lebanese-American born in Indiana--a 23 year old IU graduate who now speaks Arabic fluently, and has lived in Damascus for a year; studying the language, befriending the locals, and waging war on sexual harassment and inconsistent cab fares-- all while coping with the pros and cons of a dictatorship, and falling in love with a different world, regardless. The stereotypes and misconceptions I want to rectify through thorough and unbiased speculation were stubbornly camped in my own heart until two weeks of unfiltered Arab life ripped them from my chest with unprejudiced ferocity. I studied the fundamentals of the language and lived among the people, acknowledging American misgivings and defending American intentions-- and shitting the same bacteria-ridden food as the local Damascenes. And among the rubble of Schawarma and toilet paper I inevitably found truths that contradict the general American angst and generalization of this vastly diverse region; an understanding that is tantamount to embracing the warmth of Arabs, instead of fearing them. Part I: "The Guest is a Guest of God" I awkwardly lumbered down the steps of the A340 Airbus into a chilly April evening in Amman, Jordan, greeted by the blank apathy of an armed guard, leaning against a run-down Toyota truck and smoking a Lucky Strike. His mission is to ensure that none of the bitterly jet-lagged travelers, after a 12 hour plane ride from O'hare International, make a suicide run for Jordan off the plane, scale the barbed wire fence, traverse the hundreds of yards of brownish grass, and penetrate the armored barricades manned by Jordanian soldiers in Humvees (with their 40 caliber machine guns fixed patiently on any civilian bus, Hyundai, or pedestrian that approaches). The lonely soldier's objective, it would seem, is attainable. Royal Jordanian Airlines staffing showed similar competence to the lonely soldier, undoubtedly deployed on his trivial quest because he is an idiot. My connecting flight into Damascus (Esh-Sham, to the locals) was overbooked, and I was coerced into a $75 buyout with a night's stay in Amman. Amid the muck of confusion and a pissed international congress of RJ passengers who had been snubbed from the flight, I had no idea what was going on-- and was wholly terrified of being handed my bribe and a hotel voucher, then discarded to my demise without direction or sympathy. My savior was Arab hospitality. A Syrian named Wahim, while seeing me cursing under my breath, with sleep-deprived eyes and a dizzy expression of fatigue and anxiety, asked me in perfect English where I was headed. Wahim, too, had been sidelined from the 45 minute connecting flight to Sham, after spending seven months in Saint Louis studying for his MCAT, and dreaming of his now-delayed reunion with his fiance in Lattakia. As the manager argued in broken Italian with a handful of elderly tourists, and I stood blankly by my lonesome, Wahim explained everything that was happening, everything that was going to happen, and stuck with me throughout the mess to make sure I was informed and welcomed into the circle of us five men (four Arabs and a white guy...sitcom?). Meanwhile the Amman Airport staff and armed soldiers sat apathetically, smoking and directing us around with general waves of the hand, as the message periodically addressed the 12 civilians left in the terminal; "There is no smoking allowed in common areas, thank you." By the time I stepped onto Syrian asphalt at 8 am the following morning, I (a notoriously awkward conversationalist and social invert) made four Arab friends-- each of them providing me specific contact details and warm invitations into their homes for tea, dinner, and a local tour of their home town. The four Syrians were my guardians, and I felt warmth in their care, however broken their English. These are the men who trigger our threat level orange, who after 9/11 became suspects and angry Al-Qaeda sympathizers in the fearful angst of misinformed America and Fox News. In my broken Spanish, never in my life would I see a distressed Latino and invite him into my home for a tour of suburban Indianapolis. They did not want to simply give half-assed directions or "do the right thing," then send me on my way with their daily good-deed satisfied. Hundreds of years of culture and hospitality endeavored them to the most basic acts of kindness, lost in America behind years of media pretension toward fear and mistrust. We should not fear them; the looming Arab Weapon of Mass Destruction is mint tea. Friday, May 9. 2008Mini-achievementHi neighbor! The only slight downer besides the pain experienced by the grossly under-prepared comes at the beginning. From my vantage point towards the rear of seeded starting corral ZZZ it takes longer for me to walk up to the starting line than it does the front runners to make it to the Speedway oval and the half-way point. As the excited announcer talks about the leaders rounding Tony's place, I adjust my various braces, my shoes, and my boys, and punch my Timex. At my breakneck pace, I could have started the night before and still not beaten the Kenyans. But the sardine-in-waiting start is well worth it. The great part about the Mini is all the absolutely wonderful and crazy volunteers including a couple of guys named Mitch and Greg and a host of local residents who tirelessly hand out water, Gatorade, encouragement, live music and entertainment to the self-inflicted sufferers. The path leaves downtown and then snakes out to the middle class neighborhoods, factories, and small businesses adjoining the Motor Speedway and then makes the return trip to the high-rises. But towards the end of the journey is my personal favorite other than the jog to the finish line: the Hi Neighbor Tavern on west 10th. Every year that I've passed this liquor landmark, the friendly bikers and biker babes, cheerful wannabees and dazed bar flies have belted out cheers and handed out adult liquid encouragement as the parade passes. This year I ambled past, deferring a brewski till later, listening to the strains of "You don't have to call me Darlin', Darlin'". As always, the Hi Neighbor delivers a smile. Time for another bag of ice and to re-up for next year. Thursday, May 8. 2008Adventures in Local [Life]
Despite my optimism after Tuesday's election, I am reminded today that Indiana has a ways to go ...
FBI investigating Elkhart cross burning Wednesday, May 7. 2008Comments (0) Trackbacks (0) Adventures in Local [Politics]
As a life-long resident of Indiana (so far), I was proud to call Indiana home Tuesday. As I reviewed the list of candidates on the Democratic ballot for my district in Marion County, the candidates represented people who are protestant, Jewish, Catholic, and Muslim; male and female; and black, white, and Hispanic (I sure hope I'm not missing anyone!) ... a little microcosm of the people I see around the city.
Wednesday, May 7. 2008Comments (0) Trackbacks (0) The View from the Couch: The Party's OverIt's over, at last. The Indiana primary, that is, not Hillary Clinton's march to the Oval Office, though most every outlet has called it quits for the Senator. Their proof, though not often mentioned, is that she has been loaning her campaign more of Bill's lavish, unspeakably high, speaking fees. But she still won Indiana and by winning, however closely, helped Jill Long Thompson to win, however closely, the Democratic gubernatorial nomination, giving her the chance to go up against MY MAN MITCH. "Jillary" was the true insurgent candidate, not supported by the state's Democratic establishment and will give MMM a fight, though he will be able to swamp her with money. But she has a chance, whereas the architect would just have gone through the motions, waiting to get back to his lucrative work. So women had an effect in the Indiana primary, but not enough of an effect to give Hillary Clinton an impressive victory, just a victory. North Carolina was a different case for Obama, but who cares about North Carolina? It has been a Republican state for a number of presidential races. Bush beat Kerry there by over 400 thousand votes in 2004, a 12 percent spread. Does Barack Obama expect to find that amount of new votes for himself there in November? This remains the heart of the Hillary Clinton argument to the Superdelegates to throw their lot with her. I won the states that matter; he didn't. And there's some truth to that. Save Illinois, she has taken most of the big states that Democrats need to win. When one looks at a map of the 2004 election (here's one: http://www.cnn.com/ELECTION/2004/pages/results/president/ ) Kerry's states look like just a handful. It is always a surprise to realize Kerry would have won the election had he been able to win Ohio. In the primary contests Hillary Clinton won the contiguous sweep of New York state, Pennsylvania, Ohio, Indiana. Obama won Illinois and Wisconsin. Of course, it is likely Michigan and Florida would have gone, as they sort of did, to Clinton, had the states not altered their primary dates. Again, the Democratic primary season has been haunted by the Ghost of 2000. Obama looks like Gore: he wins the cities and the college towns; and Clinton looks like Bush. She wins the open spaces. That's how Indiana went, as well as most of the states Obama has won. Ties are ties. Obama does look like the putative nominee to be, but he will have a hard time of it in the states Democrats shouldn't have a hard time in. And it certainly isn't clear what Hillary's exit strategy is, if any. But I'm sure she's considering one now. Here's my version of what it may be. Continue reading "The View from the Couch: The Party's Over"Friday, May 2. 2008Comments (0) Trackbacks (0) The View from the Couch: Our Time is NowWell, there's four full days left before Indiana turns back into a pumpkin, loses its glass slipper, returns to the small media market scullery. Flaunt it while you can! I heard Mitch Daniels' grumpy interview on NPR yesterday (May Day!), recorded in his state house office. I was waiting for Michele Norris to ask him why he got the cost of the Iraq war so wrong back when he was in the Bush II administration, or why he hasn't taken more credit for the Bush tax cuts for the very rich, all before he broke away to selflessly serve the people of Indiana. My Man Mitch wanted to brag about his budget surplus, the lack of debt, but not once did he mention the privatizing of the toll road and Ms. Norris had the good sense, or ignorance, not to mention it, either. Not only does Mitch expect to be reelected, he wants the people of Indiana to cheer his reelection, thank him for his wonderful fire sale of Indiana's assets, not just pull his lever, rather than Jill Long Thompson's, or vote for the stolid Indianapolis architect, who has agreed to take one for the good of the state. But it is the Democrats that need focus here. It's hard to believe Indiana will end the presidential aspirations of Sen. Clinton. If anything can end anything, it would be North Carolina giving her a victory that would block Barack Obama's march to the nomination. But the question is, one I have myself, is Why should one vote for Hillary Clinton and not Barack Obama? Continue reading "The View from the Couch: Our Time is Now"Monday, April 28. 2008Comments (0) Trackbacks (0) Meanwhile in politics, religion and sex...Called ATA but they're on vacation. In politics, Barack and the Hill are still parry and the thrust; both getting melodic support from John Melancamp who has perplexingly decided that while his own John Edwards faltered, any Democrat is now more deserving of JC's words and music than any Republican. I'm guessing Cougar is stalking a ticket to the inaugural ball and thinks the old goat will be thinned from the herd. Meanwhile, in New Orleans, John McCain was trying to swim away from the Bush Administration while clinging like a drowning man to the voters who put the Bush Administration in office. Barrack used the wrong words, just like his pastor, but the Wright sentiment to describe some of us in the fly-over states as bitter when what he meant was that all politics is kitchen related as prices and wars turn sour resulting in a halt to the sweetening of the lives of our fellow men. Hill didn't duck much sniper fire until the campaign started but managed a shot and a beer on the way to looking second-and-twenty-first-amendment presidential. In political religion, Ben Stein has a new Michael Moore film out this week. It's called Expelled and involves the stifling of thought when it comes to divining what started it all. I'm still trying to prescribe Sicko to my neighbors but plan to make a pilgrimage to Ben's Expelled because if health care fails to evolve we'll all need more intelligent design. Meanwhile, the Pope flowed and ebbed and showed some atonement for some of his clerical mistakes. This Holy See can probably be given a tip of the miter for acknowledging what his papal precursors turned a blind eye to. Finally, in sex, Bill O'Reilly is shocked to find that Disney Ray Cyrus is a real, error prone teenager flashing her stomach on YouTubeTop and her back on Vain Fare. Bill, the culture worrier, is someone to keep your eye factor on. So too is Keith Olbermann, who excitedly counts strikes down to the election as he counts up the number of errors since mission accomplished. The point is to sit in a different seat every time you go to class. Without changing your perspective, all this starts to make sense. Time for another vacation... Friday, April 25. 2008Comment (1) Trackbacks (0) The View from the Couch: Indiana Counts!It's Indiana all Indiana all the time now. Finally, a place in the electoral sun! Obama says it's up to us. Hillary wants us bad. The national media will be pouring into town, snapping up motel/hotel rooms, the Clinton and Obama campaigns will help TV stations' balance sheets, the Hoosier on the street will be hounded for his/her opinions. Primary fever, ain't it grand? The Robert Kennedy campaign of 1968 is held up as the last time the state mattered, though this time it doesn't feel like 1968. In 1968 everything was darker and one reason for that is much more was mysterious back then. History now has more light shed on it, for whatever good that brings. During Sen. Clinton's victory speech in Pennsylvania, where she gathered twelve, let's hear it, twelve more pledged delegate votes, she said, with some elation, how our country "defies the odds and does the impossible," which only sadly reminded me of 9/11, where 19 jihadists really defied the odds and did the impossible, flying three planes into three targets, two with utterly catastrophic results. That is why this country is still trying to come to terms with 9/11. Our culture usually revers the underdog, the Davids versus the Golaiths, those few who gain victory over the many. One of the worse moments in our collective history mimicked one of our most dearly held popular culture fantasies: See what they got away with! Continue reading "The View from the Couch: Indiana Counts!"Friday, April 18. 2008Comment (1) Trackbacks (0) The View from the Couch: The Last DebateThe last debate lived up to its name. It was last in about every category, other than in the number of critics it has spawned. The Philadelphia debate was a bit surreal, some bad dream of Obama, or, for that matter, of Hillary Clinton. There was George Stephanopoulos grilling his former boss and, in at least Joe Klein's version of the 1992 campaign, George's former inamorata, about her Bosnia fantasies. For a while, it seemed like divorce court. Stephanopoulos is the best emblem of what has happened to journalism over the last two decades: the revolving open door between campaign consultants and high posts in the media world. Our last general president, Dwight Eisenhower, warned everyone of the perils of the military-industrial complex in 1961, but this generation has had to endure the consultant-media complex. Continue reading "The View from the Couch: The Last Debate"Friday, April 11. 2008Comments (0) Trackbacks (0) The View from the Couch: Veep WorldVice presidential candidates only matter when a presidential contender loses. The conventional wisdom is that they don't matter at all. But that pronouncement is only the ego of the winner swelling up so large it obscures whatever aid the veep brought to the ticket. This time around, like any number of occurrences in this contest, the conventional wisdom will be thwarted. The choice of vice president looms large on both sides. First, a bit of review of why the veep choice matters. One proof of the veep's importance is when an incumbent loses a second term. Take, for instance, the case of George H.W. Bush. He lost his second term for a number of reasons, principally Ross Perot, but Dan Quayle didn't bring daddy Bush one extra vote. I'm sure Quayle lost him a few. Toward the end of Bush's first term he showed a few examples of physical weakness; throwing up on the Japanese prime minister in January of 1992 wasn't helpful. The thought of a possible President Quayle cost Bush votes. And who was Jimmy Carter's vice president? See? Walter Mondale. No help there. And how about Gerald Ford's? None for a few months and then Nelson Rockefeller. And all those folks were actually president, at least for one term. For those who never won, the veep choice becomes even more stark. Continue reading "The View from the Couch: Veep World"Friday, April 4. 2008Comments (0) Trackbacks (0) The View from the Couch:Peaks and ValleysThis primary season is the culmination, the peak, of the Sixties generation coming home to roost. Not only do we have a war, two, actually, in the middle east, but we have Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama battling for the Democratic nomination, one to face the former POW of that old war, the one that marked the Sixties generation forever, along with civil rights, the feminist movement, gay liberation, etc. The election of Bill Clinton made 1992 seem to be the triumph of the '60s generation, but this election cycle has more of the elements that shaped a generation. Here we have a woman and a black guy running neck and neck. What would Martin Luther King have thought, if he hadn't been killed on this day forty years ago? Is this the Promised Land? Continue reading "The View from the Couch:Peaks and Valleys"Friday, March 28. 2008Comments (0) Trackbacks (0) The View from the Couch: Lies Damn LiesHillary Clinton has joined a growing fraternity and sorority: The Fellowship of Fantasists. For those in the literary and academic worlds, it is a familiar phenomena. The first requirement is fame. You need to have done well, be noticed. So, it was after James Frey became an Oprah best seller that his "memoir" was exposed as fake. Just as the most recent example, Margaret B. Jones, the bi-racial home girl drug courier gang member was exposed as she was stepping onto the gangplank of the Good Boat Success as Margaret Seltzer, upper-middle class suburbanite. In the academy, the historian Joseph Ellis first had to win the National Book Award and the Pulitzer Prize before it was revealed that he had been telling his Mount Holyoke students for years of his exploits as a warrior in Vietnam, whereas the ROTC officer didn't rise from behind a desk back in the States, merely teaching at West Point. Ellis, at this point, has had his reputation and job restored by a forgiving and forgetful public. And, though not of the fantasist persuasion, many a journalist celebrity plagiarist continues along happily in his and her public role as talking head. But Sen. Clinton's run across the tarmac head ducking fantasy may well prove to be a bigger chasm to leap over. Continue reading "The View from the Couch: Lies Damn Lies"Thursday, March 27. 2008Comments (0) Trackbacks (0) Sibling rivalry 'twixt non-siblingsOh yeah? Well, she looked at me first. Wednesday, March 19. 2008Comments (0) Trackbacks (0) The View from the Couch: Race and the RaceThe race now seems to be about race. Barack Obama's minister in chief has been on the cable news circuit, via two clips containing speeches reminiscent of the decades-old boogeymen subjects of the way out left Left: The CDC inventing the AIDS virus, 9/11 being "chickens coming home to roost," the God-Damn America rap. So much so, Obama had to give a speech, a la the Mormon vice-presidential hopeful Mitt Romney's oratory months ago on his own controversial faith. Obama's presentation has been generally more praised than Romney's, except in the Fox News precincts--though, the GOP hit squads, largely,have been holding their fire, waiting on the outcome of the Democratic Super Delegates ruminations. But, Barack's talk to its invited audience does show what the Clinton campaign has been complaining about for the last couple of months: Obama's hold on the media discussion. The question is not why Obama commands the airwaves, but why Hillary does not. Continue reading "The View from the Couch: Race and the Race"Sunday, March 16. 2008Learning to tiptoeI liked Ike. Hell, I even liked Harry. "If Obama was a white man, he would not be in this position. And if he was a woman he would not be in this position. He happens to be very lucky to be who he is. And the country is caught up in the concept." - Geraldine Ferraro, advisor, before resigning from the Clinton campaign. "I want to say this about my state: When Strom Thurmond ran for president, we voted for him. We're proud of it. And if the rest of the country had followed our lead, we wouldn't have had all these problems over all these years, either," - Trent Lott before resigning his position as the Republican leader in the Senate. And now Barack Obama's twenty year minister, Rev. Jeremiah Wright, who not only married the Obamas but baptized the kids has blamed US foreign and domestic policy for the 911 attacks and other atrocities. The minister has since retired. But how does Obama respond? Continue reading "Learning to tiptoe" |
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